I solemnly swear that the following set of limericks has NOTHING to do with my friend Dave who sometimes sports a neckbeard. Sorry buddy, if you ever read this, the name just rhymed.
There was once a neckbeard called Dave.
He was anti-theistic and brave.
Fat poured over his speedo
As he munched on his cheetos
And chugged mountain dew, the old knave.
One day good ol Dave got to thinkin,
As he jammed to his vinyl Park Linkin,
"I've got to remove
From mom's basement, and prove
That my life's not a ship quickly sinkin."
So on an epical journey he went
To get his life in in conditional mint:
But he quickly lost interest
And got an invite to Pinterest
And so all of his effort was spent.
Now Dave is brave more than ever--
He roams reddit trying to look clever.
Extreme halitosis
And buttocks necrosis
Complete his euphoric endeavor.
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